If You Build It, They Will Come.

Monday, December 15, 2003

You ever get that feeling where you can't tell if you're awake or still dreaming? It's not mesciline. You know that feeling that you get when you wake up from a dream? That temporary, "Where am I? Oh yeah...." feeling, where you realize that nothing that seemed to happen, did? Almost like being at the movies, and it's a really tense part of the film, and you're really into it, to the point where you don't even notice you're in the theater, and not only that, you don't even notice that you don't even notice you're in the theater. It's how dreams feel, you don't even make the conscious decision to accept them as real, you just kind of do. Then real reality sweeps in and instantly you realize that your dream was fake.

Well I'm getting that feeling about things that really happened. It could have to do with the hours I keep, but this post I finished last night at 4:47am, I was convinced until I signed on here that I hadn't actually ever written it, that it was a dream. There are dreams that I've had that I'm not sure were dreams. I was talking about the moon to someone. About being on the moon. I don't know if that really happened or not. Maybe it was a dream. Maybe it happened in both. I'm having so many dreams lately, and my dreams are seeming more like reality and my reality is seeming more like a dream. We did catch Saddam Hussein, and he did have a big Santa Claus beard, right? No one took apart my green screen, that's still here. I guess that was a dream.

The other day I was at work and I was very sick. I must've zoned out, and had a very intense daydream. In it I was in a really nice house and I had a son, who was very young, and sad that I was sick, so he made me some medicine. While it was very cute and thoughtful of the boy, I was very curious as to what he put in the mix of medicine he was handing me. If he put Drano in it, it could kill me. Although, I thought, if he could get his hands on the Drano, I was a very bad parent. Suddenly Tom asked me to move, as I was in his way and I snapped out of it, but it took me a second to figure out where I was, and I still don't know how long I was staring at that back wall.

So who knows, maybe I'm losing my mind. I don't think I need anymore sleep, I get enough. I don't know. I'm insane.


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