it's almost like laughing at the same tired joke for far too long. telling the same stories. wearing the same clothes.

this isn't me. this was me. i walked out the front door of this party years ago.

yet here i am.

it's like i never left. nothing's changed. that's the hardest part. so much should have.

i got on the train. i got off the train. somedays i can't even find the tracks.

this is not the end of the road. i refuse to let it happen. i will not lose my way.

gotta focus. gotta leave. gotta get back on the train. i know i can. i did it before. it was the best time of my life.

i can't get bogged down. i have to shift my priorities. i need to remember that i'm not staying at this party for long. but i need to grab my coat before i can leave.

(j)