If You Build It, They Will Come.

Thursday, May 30, 2002

Me and Erin Cain are at the movies, and for some reason, she has seen Attack of the Clones, just not the ending, which in my opinion is the best part. So we sneak in to watch the Yoda fight scene. But upon entering the theater we noticed there were people all over the place. Technicians, stage hands, it wasn't just the movie, they were putting on some kind of a floor show. It was apparent we were in the way of a lighting guy, so we went to go sit down, and the only seats available were in the front row. So we get there, and Obi-Wan is starting to fight Dooku, and I'm like, "Cool it's almost to the part with Yoda." And Erin starts talking to me in a loud voice. I'm like, "Dude, quiet, people are watching the movie." And she keeps doing it. The guy behind us is like, "I think I'm the only person in the theater who can't hear the movie." So I looked at Erin and said "Shh... just whipser." So she starts whispering, and then she talks loud again saying whispering makes her nauseas.

Then the movie stops. Someone comes over the god-mic and says we need to find Darth Vader. Well, from coming in late and seeing the technicians behind the seperating wall, I know right where he is. So I go to the back of the theater and I see Hayden Christensen putting on a Darth Vader mask. As I get closer, suddenly a light goes on and he bursts through the door towards the front of the theater. I run back to my seat trying not to let him know it was I who had found him. He gets to the front and I just jump in the first front row seat I can find. Erin and I are on seperate sides of the theater now. Vader is in the front of the theater. He says "Who went back there??" I sit completely still. Some guy raises his hand. Without a word, Vader fires up the light saber and takes his head off. He looks out at the audience and is like, "Anybody else?" Some other idiot raises his hand, but Darth Vader is too busy looking in my direction. He comes over to us and starts shaking peoples hands. It was at this point Erin comes back over to me. She was upset that that guy died, she was whispering this time. I was like, "Relax, it's just Hayden Christensen. I could take him." Then I ask Darth Vader if I can see his lightsabers because he has two and I want to fight with them both so I can be like he was in Attack of the Clones. He says sure, gives them both to me, and I light them up and start swinging them around. Then I hold them both to Vaders head, but I can't kill him because they are not real lightsabers, they're plastic. I give them back. He's just like, "You will now be cursed with a pimple on your nose. It is the power of the force." Then these guys come walking down the aisle rapping with cordless microphones in their hand about the power of the force. And the guy who got killed sits up, he's ok. He starts dancing to the rap song. Then it breaks out into a large musical number. I'm just sitting there with Erin thinking, I just want to watch the end of the freaking movie. That's about when I woke up.

And no joke. I have a small pimple on the side of my nose. It wasn't there last night. It must be the power of the force.


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