Happy Holidays everyone. I probably won't be posting again until 2005. Have a good one. I'll see most of you soon.

So I just saw Mulholland Drive for the first time.

Yeah.

I really really liked it, but I'm not going to lie, I've got no idea what happened.

So, I Love the 70's is on all day on VH1. I was thinking, what would be on I Love 2004? It's never just new events but pop culture stuff, movies, music, toys and stuff. What happened this year?

We came up with the election, iPods, and Spiderman 2. What else? Leave a comment.

Ok, so the internet is fun, right? Not only for the wealth of information, and interesting legitimate content, but also for the fact that any wacko-ass can publish a web page.

I found a page claiming an Illuminati conspiracy that is a gross human rights violation and is responsible for the death of billions. It's called "birth." Sounds like a funny joke, doesn't it? Yeah, this guy is serious. The Illuminati somehow have something to do with it, he gets to that at the bottom of the page, but he claims that women get pregnant to kill their children. All children grow up and die eventually and WOMEN AND THE ILLUMINATI KNOW THIS!! In that sense, sex is premeditated murder on a life that isn't even concieved yet.

Wowza. Time to arrest your parents, kids. I got my parents on three counts of attempted murder for me and my brothers.

Although, you can't get arrested for murder until someone is dead. So after I die, THEN I'll take them to court and arrest them. It'll be alright, because they'll probably be dead by then too.

But the CONSPIRACY to commit murder charge... I guess technically I was unplanned, but they can't prove it!

You're going down, Mom and Dad. I know you gave me life only so that I'd die someday. You planned this whole thing.

Evildoers!

Step Six is great. Confirm that no person... or government is currently protecting you or has any plans to protect you from this criminal act. Yes, the government is not aiding in your immortality, they're too busy getting fat and thinking of themselves.

The best, though, is the picture of the baby about a fifth of the way down the page.

This guy definately voted for Bush. Don't deny it. You know it.

Jfcr vx qctf zay rm umy kcytd.

E dcgf dcurb keyd kdetd ym wmauy, zay dcgf um tjmytd.

E dcgf um iflb cur xfy E jau.

Eq kf kfjf jficyfr xma'r zf ydf bmu mq vx bmu.

hint: I've deciphered this one, and as far as I can tell there was absolutely no code. Just a random substitution of letters. Once deciphered it is a riddle. The answer is some tangible object. If you get bored, give it a shot.

So, as it turns out I have class monday, tuesday, and wednesday from 10-1pm. Originally, I was supposed to have two full days and then a half day on wed, but my writing teacher unfortunately has to fly to New York for a funeral. My flight doesn't leave until the night of the 23rd, (technically on the 24th.) My class on monday, we are watching Three Kings. My class on tuesday, is with Larry, who I have yet to see make a single point. He's a trip, but everytime he tells us something, he gets distracted about 3/4 of the way through, and begins a new story. My class on wednesday is about the producability of my digital film, which isn't really necessary as it takes place in one location, with no special effects, and only one actor. Half of the class has already left, and yet I'm not taking off until christmas eve. I easily could have flown to Michigan friday night.

Oh well.

WINAMP.

"I will never be lonely. I will never be lonely. Said I'm neer gonna be... lonely."

"I have climbed higest mountain, I have run through the fields. Only to be with you."

"Why smash your head on pot and pans. You've got it all right in your hands..."

"Hey. Don't write yourself off yet. It's only in your head you feel left out and looked down on."

"I took a drive today. Time to emancipate. I guess it was the beatings that made me wise."

"At 17 had a better dream, now I'm 33 and it isn't me."

"Now maybe I didn't mean to treat you bad, but I did it anyway."

"I knew a man Bojangles and he'd dance for you in worn out shoes."

"Across the street the river runs. Down in the gutter, life is slipping away."

"Laughing and running hey hey. Skipping and jumping."

"It must be your skin I'm sinking in. It must be for real, cause now I can feel."

"Three important rules for breaking up. Don't put off breaking up when you know you want to."

"All the things that they make you say. And all the love that you hide away."

"Drive down the street can't find the keys to my own f-ing home."

"You don't know how you took it, you just know what you've got. Oh lordy you've been stealing from the thieves and you got caught."

"Words are flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup they slither while they pass they slip away across the universe."

Don Vito


"He's got no tiddly just joogle, you can't just goat duggle. Hammer and nail and hammer, something and expect it to grow! Beglat you've got these idiots... Sitting hernwhaga ehhhm, just sitting glawhahwaglahhh. What they're doing! "

"I'm good. I'm good. I ain't gonna hit on a 20. Are you sick in the head?... Who's gonna hit on a 20? You gotta be mentally insane. Whadberderrr... habberdere! "

"Now you've got my eyes covered with ice-en-ning!"

When told he can't just go to the Playboy Mansion:
"YESHU DO! When ya're got a 20 year subscribtion they let you in!"

F-ing Brilliant.

Ok, so the story goes, during the Harvard vs. Yale football game this year, a group of very brilliant Yale kids (and Yale kids are apparently brilliant anyway, so these guys were like superbrilliant) dressed up in red and white with shirts labeled "Harvard Pep Squad." They took a bunch of red and white posterboard (Harvard colors) and brought them into the bleachers before the game. During the game the "pep squad" then got the crowd to hold up their posterboard so that they could spell out "Go Harvard" or something. Here is the picture.

If you ever go to see the Polyphonic Spree, and there's free Kool-Aid, for the love of God, do not drink it.

Our class got cancelled today because our directors weren't prepared. So, I went to Universal Studios Theme Park. It was fun. It was free.

I called Jon while I was on the Jurassic Park ride. I saw the Shrek 4D thing, and the stuff that they had in Florida when I was there about 8 years ago. The Back to the Future thing, the T2 thing.

I got to go on the backlot tour. We went past all the places we were shooting at. Then I got to see the rest of the place, and it's pretty sweet. We drove through a Desperate Housewives taping. The backlot tour consists of all the cool sets plus what in Florida was the Jaws ride, the King Kong ride and the Earthquake ride.

I took more pictures on the backlot, I'll probably put them up here at some point.

It was kind of a bummer though, because I was at the park all by myself. I mean it was fun to get out of my room, but it was kind of lame to go to a park like that alone.

I'm feeling a lot better. I'm at about 75% I'd say. Compared to what I'd call 30% over the weekend. I hate being sick. I took a lot of medicine and vitamins last night and dropped into a small coma.

I'm working on the last two chapters of Goodbye Yellow Brick Road.

I thought this was interesting. Not at all shocking, it's just cool to see it in writing.

Tidal waves don't beg forgiveness
crash and on their way
Father he enjoyed collisions
others walked away
the snowflake falls in May.

and the doors are opened now
as the bells are ringing out
cause the man of the hour is taking his final bow
goodbye for now

nature has it's own religion
gospel of the land
father ruled by long division
young man may pretend
old man comprehend

and the sky breaks at dawn
shedding light upon this town
they all come round

as the man of the hour is taking his final bow
bye for now

and the road the old man paved
the broken seams along the way
the rusted signs left just for me
he was guiding me, love, his only way

now the man of the hour is taking his final bow
as the curtain comes down I feel that this is just
goodbye for now.

"Man of the Hour" - Pearl Jam

lordy bagordy, i hate being sick. but i love saying "lordy bagordy." i sent out a big email about the bowl picks, if you want to play, let me know.

there's a party here tonight, i'm hiding back in my room. i'm a mess. a congested snotty mess. (ew.)

i notice that when i'm down like now due to illness, i tend to believe that hitting the shift key requires too much effort. it does. YES IT DOES. ugh, that sucked. energy drained. need a jello pudding pop....

jgp

I'm starting to miss you more and more. You more than anyone. I wish things would've gone better. They didn't go bad, but they could've been better. I think we go together like black and white TV. :)

jgp

Today we salute you, Mr. Constant Collar Putter Upper. You, bedecked in popped collar, teach us that we no longer have to live with a cold, back of the neck. Sure, your pink alligator polo may look feminine to some, but not the 17 other frat guys wearing the same thing at the bar. Where others may see thoughtless fashion conformity, you preach a higher gospel. You preach of a world where it is okay for a man to go tanning. You ask "why can't we wear makeup, and use shampoo with lavender essence?" So crack open a fresh bottle of candy cologne, Mr. Abercrombie (or is it Fitch?), because we all know, when we really need a piece of gum, you might have one...in your man purse.

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before? Finished/premiered a feature, drove across the US, moved to Los Angeles, met Kevin Smith, got into a serious car accident (whilst in the car).
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? No, and no.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? Tom Lowe had a kid.
4. Did anyone close to you die? No.
5. What countries did you visit? None but here.
6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004? Ah, that special someone.
7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? 3-13. It's always 3-13. That number keeps popping up in my life. I moved out of Kalamazoo on March 13.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Getting into film school, finishing Twelve Page Paper.
9. What was your biggest failure? Same as always.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? No. Not that I recall.
11. What was the best thing you bought? I didn't really buy anything.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? Blue States.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Red States.
14. Where did most of your money go? Various gas stations and hotels across the USA, and then I lost some in Vegas. Mostly to NYFA and Kodak.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Moving to Cali, Rob and Lola's wedding, going home for Christmas, RJ's wedding.
16. What song will always remind you of 2004? Welcome to the Jungle.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Happier.
ii. thinner or fatter? Slightly thinner... I weigh less, I don't know if you can tell.
iii. richer or poorer? Temporarily richer with much much more debt.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of? I wish I'd tried a little more to meet people.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of? Switching cars. I'm on car #3 this year.
20. How will you be spending Christmas? In Michigan.
21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with? Erin, or my mom.
24. What was your favorite TV program? 24. Ironic, as this is question 24. Speaking of which, what happened to 22 and 23?
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? No, I still hate the same people.... that may be the same response I gave last year.
26. What was the best book you read? The Da Vinci Code, or Angels and Demons.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? The Pixies.
28. What did you want and get? Direction in my life.
29. What did you want and not get? Someone.
30. What was your favorite film of this year? Twelve Page Paper. Heh. Seriously, um... Twelve Page Paper.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? 24, nothing. No celebration, no hoopla, nada. I just slept in.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Eh, who knows. A gold toilet.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004? I would say I'm on the road to recovery. From college whatever bum slacker clothing, to some actual nice respectable outfits. I would say that, but it's kind of a lie. I've got one nice outfit.
34. What kept you sane? Erin. I'd have lost it a long time ago if it weren't for her. Moving forward, realizing I'm stepping toward something.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Fancy? I rather fancied Bam Margera.
36. What political issue stirred you the most? No comment.
37. Who did you miss? Everyone. Jamie, Jason, Charlie, Jon, Rob, Jackie, Lola, Laura, Yerty, Ryan, Jen, Johanna, Erin, Tera, John, Adam, Marcy, Brian, Meghan, Jeff, Steve, Matt, Mom, Dad, Brent, Jordan, Mark, Steve, Angie, Brill, Logan...
38. Who was the best new person you met? Curtis Willis. "I'll teach you and your friends about pyan."
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004: You're gonna die, so do everything you want to before you go.
40. Quote a song/movie lyric that sums up your year: "You are who you love, not who loves you."

I got this new screenwriting software that is totally sweet. I tested it out by writing a stream of consciousness screenplay. For your enjoyment, here is that stream of consciousness screenplay.

Happy birthday Nopa.


INT. A WAREHOUSE - DAY
An APE runs through the building, eating everything in sight. He hates Christmas, but he loves New Years Eve. The MARLBORO MAN rides in on a phat Harley. He stares into the eyes of the ape.

APE

Ooga booga.

MARLBORO MAN

I’ll eat your chimp babies you hairy beast.

APE

Ooga up yours smoker booga. You think you’re the shit?

Then in a flash of light, the fucking shit hits the fan. Everyone starts singing a love song by Elton John. As the rain falls on the cold sidewalk outside, inside it’s a mad ape on ape orgy.

MARLBORO MAN

What the hell is up with this?

APE

I can’t stand it no longer! Ooga!

Ninja’s enter the room.

MARLBORO MAN

Alright, ape, we’re throwing down for the last time.

The Marlboro Man puts on his Kung Fu outfit. The ape jumps through the air in the mad rain.

APE

Ooga ninja!!

it only hurts when i think about it
it only hurts when i go without it
it's my crutch and it's my cane
life is...

i'm just a failure boy.

deja vu
its amazing, this is exactly the same
no matter how much i try to believe the contrary, you are all the same.

the nights you filled with fireworks they left you with nothing

You know, I hear about "double standards" a lot. One I hear a lot of women say is that if a guy has sex a lot, he's cool, but if a women has a lot of sex, she's a slut. I think there's an interesting debate to have as to why that is, and perhaps Krissy will leave a lot of comments again. But let's be honest, guys suffer from double standards as well. Take the case of this 14 year old boy who had sex with his teacher. That's creepy and weird, and pretty wrong, but why is there no huge public outcry about it? If a male teacher had sex with his 14 year old female student, he'd be spending the rest of his life in jail. No one is even calling this woman a pedophile, or saying statutory rape. They're just saying "Eww, gross." Yeah, she's going to court and probably going to jail, but the outrage isn't there. Not even in me. Why do you suppose that is?